~ i want you to come empty-handed ~

this is the first and the last time i embed a video as the main contents. i know i usually link music because it simply always is there. this one is special. my soulscape for the coming weeks, found and granted by myself-claimed godparents. and just a few entries ago mentioning myself feeling like persephone. strange, strange synchronized now.

my mantras again

she commits blasphemy because she is a believer

and

because you Murder her, she arises Again

do you know

if you google this quote, you will get only one result: a one directing you to my blog. 

William, are we that solitary?

~ some kind of fool ~

because you Murder her she arises Again

call her names.

~ i read in these ash signs - ~

when you're on the edge and drunk, you don't think. and when you don't think, you might end up foretelling your future from a random page of a random book, might you not. a random sentence of a greenbacked voice.

but i said: 'if you please, we will commit ourselves to this void, and see whether Providence is here also. if you will not, i will.' but he answer'd: 'do not presume, o young man, but as we here remain, behold thy lot, which will soon appear when the darkness passes away.'

william, seriously? the pages i've always felt were meant for me, now at random? is a sign that obvious still a sign or is it more like a poke in the head of a fool?

- we've been through hell

even if married

they say manuscripts never burn

shall we see if i am one

~ inner shores ~

step into this room and dance for me

as if you scented a flower in your early childhood, through a mist you seek what lingers there all these years. you remember a trace imprinted on the brim of your taste buds. a promise you follow at the verge of your senses. you won't rest until it fills your nostrils, rests on your tongue, flows down your spine falling with you into the soil, until it moves in your hair. inner shores. you never know where they lead.

and at times i find myself seeing love and music as one and the same thing. so -

hold me closer than that

~ it's only castles burning ~

a snapshot from long years of fiddling with darkness so dense that you could mould it with your own hands and feel its pulse going through your whole body. this riff still does.

when risking with your life, it's the light side that scares the most. both by the intensity of light and the depth of shadow it can cast. dante. william. neil. unholy trinity that unchangeably gives me so much strength and that has granted me a warming halo for today. now landed in an evening.
so. this is how it is to defeat darkness and feel its eyes watching every following step.
so. this is why to look back is to fail in the very moment of looking.

mor gi oss solen

mother, give us sun.

yours,

osvald, arthur and .w

~ fearless ~

.,.

~ limbo ~

excess of sorrow laughs. excess of joy weeps.

now, william
watch
footprints cold

there is much to be denied

~ stupid white women ~

this is one of my favs by munch, current #1. the voice.

just finished watching dead man. now imagine: black&white jarmusch, dark western (though i don't really enjoy this genre), johnny depp, an indian who reads william blake and all with neil young's musical illustration.

i'm quite possessed by this soundtrack right now. guitar solo 5 is what sounds in my head when i fall asleep. and the ending song, the clouded sea under the eyelids.

the image of william falling asleep next to the roe-deer. we might change places, i feel our minds and hearts are alike, we paint the same signs on our foreheads. i only lack this powerful yet delicate, tearing guitar passage as a frame.

*smile* just realized i'm a darkness junkie.

nothing to be done about that, there's too much life in this friction.

and i need to feel my heart beat. fast.

some are born to sweet delight

some are born to endless night